


Resistance Actually Is Futile

by pinn



Category: Panic At The Disco
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-24
Updated: 2010-01-24
Packaged: 2017-10-06 15:30:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,881
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/55147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pinn/pseuds/pinn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"You don't want to deal with touring and bullshit ego trips and not showering for three days straight," Cassie recites, obviously from memory. It's possible that Jon has expressed his opinion on this once or twice. "Never mind that you just spent the last seven months doing exactly that."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Resistance Actually Is Futile

Jon walks into the dressing room after they finish the set at the Weenie Roast, and immediately apologizes for messing up the last song.

Ryan waves his hand dismissively before he turns back to the mirror to check his makeup. "It's cool. Better that we have a bass player who misses the cue than no bass player at all."

Brendon's collapsed on the couch, chugging water. "Truer words et cetera."

"So listen," Spencer chimes in from where he's sitting on the floor. "You should join the band."

Jon stares dumbly at the three of them. "And do what?"

"Play bass," Ryan says slowly.

"You already have a bassist." Jon's starting to think that maybe he should drink some water or something. The heat's clearly fried his brain.

Spencer exhales loudly. "Probably not for much longer."

"Okay, whatever." Jon shakes his head and grabs his phone. "I'll see you guys later."

He locks himself into the first empty, quiet room he finds and hits the autodial for Cassie's number. She picks up after one ring and says, "I keep checking YouTube for video but there's nothing yet. How did it go?"

"Good, really good." Jon's actually surprised by how much he enjoyed the set. It's been a while since he played in front of a crowd and those audiences were never as big as the one today. He didn't know half the songs and he sweated through his shirt but it was also the most fun that Jon's had in months.

"Awesome," Cassie says.

"Yeah, well, they actually asked me to join the band."

"That must have been some amazing bass playing," Cassie says without missing a beat. "What did you say?"

"I said they already had a bassist."

"Jon," Cassie says patiently. "Why did you do that?"

"Because they already have a bass player, and because I don't want to be in a band. We've talked about this before, Cass, you know how I feel about it." Jon traces the doorframe with his fingertip.

"You don't want to deal with touring and bullshit ego trips and not showering for three days straight," Cassie recites, obviously from memory. It's possible that Jon has expressed his opinion on this once or twice. "Never mind that you just spent the last seven months doing exactly that."

"That was different. It wasn't permanent. And anyway, I'm going back to school in the fall." Jon rubs his hand over his face. The adrenaline high is wearing off and his shirt is sticking to his back. He sniffs his armpit and grimaces. "Look, can we just change the subject?"

"Sure," Cassie agrees. "Have you figured out when you're coming back yet?"

"Tomorrow night. I'll call you from the airport?"

"Sounds good. Go have fun."

 

+

 

The next morning, Jon's half-awake and debating whether he wants to get some coffee or go back to sleep when his phone starts ringing. He slaps his hand around on the bedside table until he finds it and answers it.

"So, Brent's out," Spencer says, his voice high and tight. "Now will you join?"

Jon sits up and holds his phone up to his ear with his shoulder while he rubs his eyes. "What?"

"We kicked Brent out last night so we have an opening for a bass player."

"No," Jon says automatically. He's been turning down requests to join bands since 5o4plan broke up, and he's gotten pretty good at it.

"Fuck," Spencer exhales.

Jon's stomach clenches up. "Spencer, you didn't kick Brent out for me, did you?"

"No!" Spencer snaps. "We kicked him out because he kept missing shows and he couldn't play. We were just kind of hoping you would step in. Now we have to start looking for someone else."

"Hang on," Jon yawns and makes a quick decision. "How about I fill in until you find someone? Will that work?"

"Let me ask the guys." Jon hears Spencer repeat what he just said. Ryan and Brendon's voices are muffled, but Spencer returns quickly. "Okay. Our next show is on the twenty-second. When can you start practicing?"

"Give me an hour."

"We'll meet you in the lobby." Spencer hangs up the phone.

Jon stares at his phone in shock. He's not really sure why he just suggested that he fill in for them but he's pretty sure it goes against everything he told Cassie yesterday. Jon makes a conscious decision not to worry about it too much and forces himself out of bed. The sooner he showers, the sooner he can get some coffee.

 

+

 

Nine days later, when they're sitting around the hotel room after filming the Carson Daly thing, Spencer, Brendon, and Ryan look at each other and nod in unison before they all turn to Jon.

"Listen, we really think you'd be a good fit," Brendon says. "We're asking you to join the band."

"No thanks." Jon takes a sip from his beer and changes the subject.

 

+

 

Spencer's the first to take him aside and talk to him about it. After they do their set at the HFStival, Spencer begs Jon to go hunting for smoothies with him. They finally find the booth, far off from everything else, and Jon's happily sucking on the straw, enjoying his strawberry smoothie, when Spencer asks, "Is it because we kicked Brent out?"

Jon flinches in surprise and the straw jabs the roof of his mouth. "What?"

"Are you saying no because we kicked Brent out? I can't guarantee anything but we probably wouldn't kick you out. It seems like you know how to play and show up on time." Spencer looks worried and Jon is reminded exactly how old Spencer is not.

"No, man." Jon wraps his arm around Spencer's shoulders and aims them in the direction of the bus. "You guys did what you had to do, I respect that."

"Then why?"

He probably should have explained this from the beginning. "Because I just don't like touring, and I don't like dealing with all the bullshit that comes along with it. I love playing and that's about it. I tried it with 5o4, and it just wasn't for me."

"Why did you agree to fill in then if you don't like all this?" Spencer waves his around to indicate the organizers running around, yelling into walk-talkies, the water balloon fight by Rise Against's bus, and the fans lined up behind the fence waiting for autographs.

"You guys are my friends," Jon says simply. "I help my friends out."

 

+

 

Next up is Ryan. He sits Jon down in the dressing room the afternoon of the first show on the tour and launches into an hour-long lecture about why Jon should join the band. Honestly, Jon forgets almost all of it immediately. For some reason, Ryan's monotone always sends Jon back to his tenth-grade history class. All he really knows is that he's ridiculously hungry by the time Ryan wraps it up. (This is probably because history was Jon's last class before lunch.)

At the end, Ryan looks at him expectantly and Jon shrugs apologetically. Ryan huffs in frustration.

"Look, it's not a personal thing," Jon says soothingly. " You guys are great but you're on your way to the top and that's not something I really want. I saw what happened to Pete and Patrick. They lost their privacy, their normal lives. That's not for me. I just want to hang out with my girlfriend and my cat, take some pictures, and finish up college."

"Fine," Ryan grumbles. "I have to do my make-up."

"It's five hours to showtime."

"I know, I'm totally running behind." Ryan opens up his Caboodles case.

Ryan Ross is one weird little dude, Jon thinks as he heads back to the bus. He's almost going to miss Ryan when they finally find someone to take over the bass.

 

+

 

Jon's sitting on the couch in the front lounge of the bus, waiting for the driver, when Brendon sits in his lap. "What would it take to get you to join, Jon Walker? Do you want Spencer written into your contract?"

"Hey!" Spencer squawks from his bunk.

"It's only because of your womanly hips, Spencer," Brendon calls back. "Ross and I are too skinny to keep Jon satisfied."

"Brendon, I swear to god, I'm going to punch you in the face," Spencer threatens.

"Fine." Brendon turns back to Jon and mouths 'we can totally put him in the contract'.

Jon snorts and pushes Brendon on the floor. "Spencer can keep his hips to himself. Thanks for the offer, Brendon, but I just don't want to join another band."

Brendon pouts. "You'll succumb to our charms soon, Jon Walker. Resistance is futile."

 

+

 

From then on, it becomes a running joke. The guys recruit the other bands, the techs, a few merch girls, and even Zack. Every night, someone different comes up to Jon and asks him to join Panic. Every night, Jon just laughs and shakes his head. People start getting creative, and Brendon establishes a prize for the best one. Jon's personal favorite is when the Dresdon Dolls make flashcards and choreograph a dance to go along with it.

Every night, he talks to Cassie and every night he tells her about the latest stunt. Cassie just sighs and says, "Still not in the band?"

The thing is that Jon's having the time of his life. He's finally learned the songs and he's comfortable enough with them to start improvising a little. The guys encourage him too, and it starts to feel like a real collaboration.

Zach wins the competition when he gets on his knees and serenades Jon after the show in D.C.

Later that night, before the busses pull out for New York, Jon's in the back lounge by himself, flipping his phone open and closing it again. The other guys are hanging out on the The Hush Sound's bus. Jon stayed behind to talk to Cassie and now he doesn't feel like getting up from the couch. He starts scrolling through his contacts list on his phone, deleting people that he hasn't talked to in forever, when he comes across Nick's name.

He hits send and waits. After a couple of rings, Scimeca picks up and says, "JWalk, tell me those Panic boys haven't corrupted you completely."

"Nope, still me," Jon answers.

"Thank god. I was worried when Tommy told me what you were doing. As long as you stay strong and resist the lure of make-up, it should be okay."

Jon rubs his eye and stares at the smear of eyeliner on his hand. "Yeah, still resisting."

"So what's it like, man? Cocaine and hookers 24/7?"

Jon snorts. "The guys are on the Hushies bus right now playing an endless game of Monopoly and drinking Kool-aid."

"Wow, that's even more hardcore than I thought," Nick deadpans.

"I know." Jon pauses before he speaks again. "They keep asking me to join the band."

"I thought you already had."

"No, I'm the temporary bassist while they look for a new one," Jon explains.

"Why isn't it you?" Nick asks.

"Part of the reason why we ended 5o4 was because I didn't want to tour anymore. Doesn't it seem kind of strange that I'm touring now?"

Nick waits him out and Jon grinds his teeth until he figures out what to say.

"You've listened to them, right? You know they're on the way up. I don't know if I want that."

Jon can almost hear Nick nodding as he says, "Yeah, I hate it when I stumble into a great fucking situation with a band that's blowing up the charts. It's a real bummer."

"Dude, come on," Jon says, "be serious. I saw what all that did to Pete and Patrick. I don't want that craziness."

"Jon," Nick sighs. "You're not signing on to become rich and famous, even though you totally will be. You're signing on to play music that you like playing. Stop asking yourself if you want the fame and start asking yourself if you're having fun."

Before Jon can answer, the lounge door slams open and Brendon comes running in. "Jon, Jon! I won Monopoly. I'm so awesome it hurts. Come celebrate, we're doing Kool-Aid shooters."

As Brendon's dragging Jon up and off the bus, Jon barely hears Scimeca say, "There you go."

 

+

 

Jon's stretching and warming up before the show in New Jersey when Brendon finds him.

"What's up, Bden?" Jon asks as he drops on to the ground and stretches his arms over his head.

Brendon shifts from one foot to another for a few seconds before he looks up at Jon and says, "You should know that Spencer and Ryan haven't actually been looking for a replacement bassist."

"What?" For the last month, every time Jon's asked them about the search, they just shrug and say that they can't find anyone they like.

"They keep hoping you're going to change your mind." Brendon rolls his eyes. "Look, I get why you keep saying no but if you mean it, really mean it, then you need to tell them. It's kind of not fair to keep us in limbo."

Jon doesn't reply and Brendon does a little hop before he shakes his head. "So, I should go warm up. I'll see you at preshow?"

"Yeah."

As Brendon's walking out the door, Jon says, "Thanks, Brendon."

The show that night is one of the worst since their first one together, and Jon can feel Ryan and Spencer staring at him in the dressing room afterwards. Jon doesn't say anything to anyone, just changes into his street clothes and gets Zack to walk him to the bus. As soon as the door closes behind Zack, Jon curls up in his bunk and calls Cassie.

"Hey," she says softly when she picks up.

Jon doesn't bother with pleasantries, he just starts talking. "They haven't been looking for a new bassist."

"What?"

"Brendon told me tonight that Ryan and Spencer aren't even looking for a new bassist. They just keep hoping that I'll say yes." Jon drapes his arm over his eyes. The weight is heavy and reassuring.

"Why are you upset about this?" Cassie asks.

"Because," Jon whines.

"Sweetie, that's not an answer."

Jon says what he's been thinking since he talked to Nick. "What would you say if I said I wanted to join the band?"

"I'd be ecstatic that I didn't have to listen to this whining and waffling anymore," Cassie snorts. "Also, I'd be happy for you if this is what you want."

"But what about us? What about Dylan?"

"Oh my god, you're such an idiot. Do you honestly think that Dylan or I are going anywhere?"

"No," Jon mumbles.

"Jon, I love you and I want you to be happy. If playing in a band, this band, makes you happy, then so be it. We've made it work so far, we'll keep making it work."

That seals the decision.

A half-hour later, after Cassie's caught him up on her day and Dylan's latest antics, Jon says, "You know, we have the day after the Chicago show off."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I was thinking I could hang out with you and Dylan that day."

"Ooh," Cassie sucks in a breath. "I don't know. I think I'm super-busy that day with doing nothing and just last night, Dylan was saying that he was double-booked on the eighth. He wasn't sure if he was going to be sleeping in the windowsill or sprawled out on the couch that day."

Jon laughs. "Oh hey, I understand. I'll just tell the guys we can go to St. Paul early."

"No, no," Cassie says quickly. "I'm sure we can make time for you."

"Hey thanks, that's real kind of you."

Cassie yawns then and Jon looks at the clock. It's kind of late in the world of normal people. Jon says, "Go to bed. I have to go talk to my band."

"You're a dork. I love you. Call me tomorrow?"

"Yep. Love you too." Jon closes his phone and takes a deep breath. He heard everyone walk by his bunk awhile ago so he knows they're back on the bus. Jon pushes himself out of the bunk and heads to back lounge where the guys are playing video games.

He walks in front of the TV and says, "Someone should ask me something right now."

"Why are you interrupting my video game?" Spencer asks.

Brendon pauses the game and looks at him knowingly. "Jon Walker, are you insinuating what I think you're insinuating?"

Jon shrugs and smiles. "You won't know until you ask."

Ryan picks his head up from his book and narrows his eyes. Spencer drops his controller, leans back on his hands, and tilts his head until he makes eye contact with Ryan. They both look up at Jon.

No one says anything for a few seconds and Jon is ready to say fuck it and tell them when Brendon asks, "Jon Walker, will you join our band?"

Fucking finally.

"Well, it's not like I'm going to get a better offer anytime soon," Jon says casually. He drops on the couch next to Ryan. "Yeah, I guess I will."

"Ha!" Brendon crows. "I told you resistance was futile."

Apparently it was.


End file.
